Yes, but are they seducing each other?

Just Exactly What Is Seduction?

Yes, but are they seducing each other?
Yes, but are they seducing each other?
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Hmm, as naughty and as exciting as seduction sounds, do any of us really know what it is. I mean, if I was to ask you for a definition of what seduction was, what would you tell me? Would you say that it’s a way to get somebody into bed? Well ok, that’s one possible outcome, but do you really think that that’s all there is to it? What is this thing that we call seduction?

What Society Says Seduction Is

When in doubt, we always can turn to our old friend Merriam –Webster (the dictionary people) and ask them what they think that seduction is. Here’s what they have to say:

se•duc•tion noun \si-ˈdək-shən\:
: the act of persuading someone to have sex with you
: something that interests and attracts people

Well now, that rather confirms it doesn’t it – seduction is all about sex. Well, but not quite. Did you happen to notice that second definition? It’s the part that says “… something that interests and attracts people…” This is where things start to get interesting.

If you are in a relationship, sure persuading the other person to have sex with you is a great goal. However, that sure seems like sorta a one shot deal – thanks, that was great, now what? If you’re willing to take a look at that second definition, well then you’ve got something that appears to have some legs to it.

To interest your partner and to attract them to you is not a one-shot deal. Rather it’s something that is going to take some time to do correctly. Even more important than that, it’s going to be something that is never ending. Unlike that “more sex” thing, a proper seduction goes on and on and on.

What I Think That Seduction Is

I happen to think that seduction is an art form. When done correctly, it’s a powerful tool that can be used for good. It’s not easy to be a seducer, I mean who among us has been trained at this kind of thing?

My definition of seduction is probably a little more in line with the way that the folks who wrote the Wikipedia entry see things:

… Seen positively, seduction is a synonym for the act of charming someone — male or female — by an appeal to the senses, often with the goal of reducing unfounded fears and leading to their “sexual emancipation”

Once again, that sex thing seems to have slipped into the definition around the edges. I think that I’m ok with that. My view is that if you perform the art of seduction well, then you’ll draw your partner closer to you. You’ll reduce any distance that exists between you.

One possible outcome of a successful seduction is, of course, more sex. However, I believe that there is a lot more to be had here. A well done seduction will create a tight lasting bond between you and your partner that will be able to stand the test of time. External temptations and distractions will no longer be able to have a negative impact on your relationship.

What All Of This Means For You

Thanks to this thing called the Internet, a quick Google search on the term “seduction” will generate millions of results. Most of those results have to do with teachers and courses that will show you how to pick up members of the opposite sex in a bar even if they would normally never give you the time of the day.

I think that all of that is focusing on Merriam-Webster’s first definition of seduction a bit too much and not enough on the second definition. I believe that the art of seduction is a set of skills that anyone can use in order to draw their partner closer to them and by doing so create a stronger relationship.

With all of this being said, it does bring up the question of how hard it is to properly seduce that other person in your relationship. Well, I’m not going to lie to you, it can be tough because everyone is different and there is no magic formula or silver bullet that’s going to “attract and interest them” in you. The good news is that it can be done and I think that knowing that is what gives all of us the strength to go on and the willingness to learn just a little bit more about this seduction thing every day…

– Dr. J

Question For You: How do you define seduction. Is it all about sex or do you think that there’s more to it?

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